Rochelle, Judith The Hired Wife

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indication of her mood. Sarah, I m so sorry about Thanksgiving night. There s no
justification for any of the things I said or did. You deserve much better than that.
Yes, I do. She bit her lip, not knowing what else to say.
Reno raked his fingers though his hair. I ve been so terrified of losing you. The things
I said that night? I wanted to take them back the minute they were out of my mouth, make
them go away, but you were already up the stairs. I felt worse when I finally admitted to
myself how much I love you, but I didn t know how to fix things.
So you decided to get drunk instead. She said the words flatly, watching him.
No. I was just trying to blunt the pain and find some answers. By the time I realized
they weren t in the bottle, I was already wasted,
Why didn t you let me know how you felt? she asked. What did you think would
happen? That I d run away? She fiddled with her wine glass, forcing herself to be calm.
Surely you had to sense I had feelings for you, too.
The Hired Wife 83
Truthfully? I was afraid.
She stared at him. Afraid of what?
Of my own life, I think. And in the end, afraid of what you d say if I came to you
sober, gave you the whole story. And told you I loved you.
What story? What is it that s so hard for you to get out? The real issue here, whether
you want to see it or not, isn t what happened the other night. The root of the problem is
Lexie. Everything leads back to her. If you can t tell me the truth, if you won t let me know
what this is all about, then I don t know what we have to talk about.
He drew another deep breath, as if sucking courage from the air. You re right. I need
to tell you things you should have known from the beginning. I was just so sure if I did, you d
turn me down. Then what would I do? He took a swallow of his wine. This is an ugly story
that doesn t make me look so good, but you deserve to know it all. Then I guess the rest is up
to you.
He turned toward the fireplace, leaned his arm on the mantel, and with his head
bowed, told her a tale that by turns shocked and saddened her. In short sentences he told her
about the death of his parents when he was still in college, his fight to hang on to Tony, four
years younger, meeting Nick and their decision to leave their jobs with a security company
and open their own agency.
In fourteen years they d built Guardian into national prominence, but while Nick
married twice and now had a child, he, Reno, had avoided all but the most casual
relationships. He reminded her of his vacation two years ago, the first he d ever taken. He
told her about Maggie - voluptuous, exotic, and predatory who d targeted him that first
night. The heady tropical drinks, seductive and treacherous in their sweetness. Being
thousands of miles from home where no one could see if he made a fool of himself. And a
week of the basest kind of lust where he never remembered one sober minute. And his haste
to get away from her when he finally stropped drinking.
Then the news of her pregnancy and her demand for marriage. He was adamantly
opposed to abortion, and he realized he wanted a child very badly. He was able to keep
Maggie off the booze while she was pregnant, frightened to death of fetal alcohol syndrome,
but the baby wasn t a week old before she was binging again.
And in a tortured voice he told her how Lexie had captured his heart at once, how she d
made it all worthwhile, given his life new purpose. Then Maggie had destroyed it all. He was
a rich prize and she d baited the trap with someone else s child. He still felt disgust that he d
let himself be trapped by her. Since then, he could hardly bring himself to look at the little girl
without being reminded of how he got himself in this position and how he d been betrayed.
Judith Rochelle 84
Chapter Twenty-Two
When he finished, Sarah sat rooted to her seat, stunned.
She didn t know what she d expected to hear, but it wasn t this awful tale of greed,
deception and betrayal. How could a woman be so uncaring with the lives of a wonderful
man and a beautiful child?
I acted like a fool, he rasped. Something I try not to do very often, you know. Just,
he shrugged, it happened. I was drunk and thought I was the one taking advantage of her.
Sarah sat perfectly still, not saying a word.
He began pacing again. I don t think Maggie and I even liked each other. What we
had was lust of the basest kind. She knew how to punch my buttons and get whatever she
wanted. I let her do it. You can t be any more disgusted with me than I am with myself. I
deserved what I got.
So here it is at last. She knew it had to be something this bad to make him behave the
way he had. She d worked with this man for five years and been married to him all these
months. She knew him underneath it all, a good, decent person whose only failing was he was
human. So much was clear to her now.
I know you must hate me for the way I ve treated the child. He shook his head. It
was very painful admitting to myself that a big part of this was my pride.
He took the poker and stirred the logs in the fireplace, obviously giving himself
something to do. Please try to understand. I only married Maggie because she said she was
pregnant with my child. And I wanted that child. When Maggie told me the baby wasn t
even mine, I was destroyed. I d gone through the marriage from hell for nothing.
Sarah thought of Lexie, the unknowing center of the turmoil, a constant reminder of
everything. Her throat tightened with emotion.
Sarah? She could hear the edge of fear in his voice as he waited for her to break her
silence.
That s why you d never let me into your bedroom, isn t it, she said at last. Because
Maggie had slept in there with you.
He nodded. I didn t want you touched by her filth. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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